Doing Christmas…The Fest Way-Part One

I woke up on Christmas with my head throbbing.  I had not slept very long and had wasted too many hours trying to respond to more bullshit.  We were a week out, and I was still being accused of things I could not make up if tried.  I kept waiting for anyone in my family to explain what the hell was going on.  They must have been busy with the holidays and all the joy that comes with it this year.

King Shit’s email on the night of the 18th was full of “blah, blah”.  However,  one sentence stood out, ” I’d have to tell him about the Dumb Shit’s missing DVD player and drugs that were gone after you both were over there cleaning.”  The person KS wants to tell is my son, because apparently KS has no ability to decipher sarcasm. There was a lot more he would “have to tell him”.  I saved him the trouble and printed it out. Now my son can use the wisdom it contains as a guide to get through life.

My father had also sent an email about the mysterious “missing” items.  I did not read it until after K.S’s ramble, but his included a little more F-you in it.  His let me know that my mother had felt so bad she bought Dumb Shit a new DVD player.  If anyone would have bothered to ask, we would have given her one of five that we own.  I often wonder what they think I was going to do with another one, pawn it for fifty cents of crack?  Oh, wait I guess it would be for fifty cents worth of the same “pills” they all take.

Since every dime we had been able to scrape up had been to keep a roof over our heads, there was not much for Christmas.  When my son asked if his gifts from everyone were in the truck that was parked by KS’s house I wanted to throw up.  I had sent emails to my parents demanding a few things that only came out because I was pissed.  However, the one demand I did mean was they needed leave their grandson something for Christmas before they went on their “holiday”.

Another family member did tell me later that they did not know where to leave anything. That is ironic because the one person who took ten seconds to think about my son managed to get us some goodies without even seeing us. I remember Christmas as a child, and I know for a FACT that my deceased grandparents would have made sure I had something.  Even if my mother was sitting on the corner smoking crack after stealing their diamond’s to buy it. I guess the fact they think I am not entitled to human decency, runs through my blood into his.

In our mad rush to get out of the Hell House, we left our son’s PS3 in the room.  In a week we had gone from you can come by to get your things anytime to ” step foot on the property and I will call the police.”  Which by now there was no way I would step on the property without the police. So much shit had been made up I had no idea what was going to come next.  Maybe… steal my grandmother’s antiques?

Within two days of the “missing” DVD player KS had spun a little story about “antiques”.  I would like to think that one of them had made a comment to him about how asinine the DVD player sounded.  However, now these were not missing, I was “planning” on stealing them so I think he had digressed a little.  My father did send an email asking if it was true that I was planning on stealing some items from my grandmother that had been under fifty feet of dirt and crap scattered across a half an acre of backyard.

The police followed me to the Hell House to get my son’s PS3 on Christmas Day.  I had promised him I would get it and I do not promise my kids anything unless I know I can make it happen.  However, if I had known KS was going to play dirty I might have thought twice before making that one…

 

One thought on “Doing Christmas…The Fest Way-Part One

  1. Pingback: SPUN2013-Family Loyalty-In The Traditional F88KFEST Way | SPUN

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